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Monday, November 29, 2010

Who Do You Say I Am?

When I put my daughters in a Christian-based pre-school at the ages of three, never did I imagine that they were going to lose their personal experience of God. Maybe I was naive or maybe just hopeful that their faith would be solidified in such a place. Hardly so. Within two years, their image of God as “flute” was replaced by the common, age-old, impersonal image of the “old man in the sky”. “How did this happen?”, I wondered and “when?” I guess it happened so quickly that I didn’t even notice.
Uncanny, the same church which houses this pre-school, adorns a large wall with a wondrous painting that depicts a question Jesus, himself, asked his disciples a long time ago. It resides at the top of a long staircase and greets with a foggy image of two eyes accompanied by a caption at the bottom, Luke 9:20, that reads: “Who do you say I am?” Now, there is nothing old looking about the eyes that stare out of this painting, nor a trace of grey hair. In fact, the eyes are both piercing and welcoming at the same time. They seem to be opening a door for the weary traveler to consider, perhaps a kind of mystery to embark upon? Unlike the Eastern Orthodox icons, there is no preconceived notion that this is Jesus or Christ or anyone that you might recognize from the traditional biblical stories. Just a pair of eyes lying in a misty fog, making no assumptions or claims, yet striking directly to one’s core.
“Maybe these Lutherans aren’t as impersonal about God as I thought?”, I wondered. Maybe they aren’t as tainted by the old man in the sky image after all? Maybe they do want to get personal with God but just don’t know how? Whatever the reasoning behind displaying such a mysterious image in such a prominent place, it makes me hopeful about the church. Hopeful that the church isn’t completely hyper-focused on programming, policy-making, church growth/development and even Bible study that it no longer “wonders” about anything anymore. The same wondering that my children lost when confronted by the old man in the sky image seems to be alive and well when I see such a painting hanging in such a place. A place that is supposed to be a vehicle for God’s creative mystery on earth, yet seems to have lost it’s way and more interested in clinging on to material world assurances.
Now that my children are confirmation age and have to decide for themselves whether a church is the right place for them to profess their faith in God, I can’t help but hope that they too will not lose hope in the church. Yes it has “control issues,” and yes Jesus’ question to his disciples is usually covered up with rote affirmations and dogma but once in while a connection to God is actually made in church. Whether it’s during Communion, a particular scripture reading or during coffee hour, God does seem to break through all the muck and make appearances in church too. And maybe that is all I can hope for when it comes to my kids living out their faith. To always look for God in all situations and in all places. Whether it’s in nature, sports, art, friends, family and even the church, God doesn’t seem to discriminate. I believe God mostly just asks for an open heart and mind and to honor an active imagination. Now that is something my kids most likely already knew upon entering pre-school!
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